Things that should and shouldn't be...

Interesting day today. Many things that should and shouldn't be have caught my attention today. I'll mention a few.

First, Emmiline noticed what appears to be a summer squash in our garden today. It was planted in mid to late April, and it's just now taking shape. Summer squash are called, “summer” because they bloom in summer... and they have a very short storage life! Very strange thing that shouldn't be, but it is.

Was trying to get my son, Elliott, dressed for the day. Knew he'd see some grandparents and some very dear friends. Elliott turns 4 next month! Man, that's crazy. Anyways, that's background information to know as I share this... As I tried to find a pair of pants that might fit him... well, repeatedly I discovered that many of the 24 month (and 2T) sized britches would fall right off of him. They wouldn't stay up in the waist. Man, that's a little dude. Seems like it shouldn't be to me... not worried about it.

The same little man is shown in these pictures... trying his best to help his little sister play with a toy. I know he was born with a depraved nature, but for a very young man... he seems to deeply, deeply care. Seems rather strange... almost like it shouldn't be, but I'm glad that it is the way it is.

Was blessed to have a window into a dear loved one's heart today. As he shared some of the heaviness in his life and heart, I didn't even know how to respond. Multiple relational issues of such incredible gravity... each on its own enough to cause deep anguish of the soul. And, I do not use, “anguish of the soul lightly!” Those are not words I would associate with losing a job or moving out of town! His struggles definitely qualify to fit the word, “anguish.” Yet, he did not seem bitter. Nor did he seem hopeless. Even though he had reason for both. He seemed authentic... seemed to be a man of perseverance... a man who would stop trying. From his situation, it would just make sense that he would have anger and resentment flowing through his veins, but he doesn't. Doesn't make sense to the natural mind. Shouldn't be, but he has hope. He seeks strength from the Lord.

Personally, still celebrating the great gift of getting to serve and learn at my new church in Dayton, Ohio. Man, so excited. So grateful. My mind's moving toward all of the “to do's” associated with a new job, selling a home and moving. Although I've been given something that I've so deeply desired (more than I can remember desiring anything!), I still catch myself getting frustrated at little things far more easily than I should. That shouldn't be. Shouldn't I be passed that? I also hear a voice in my head of self-doubt. Don't want to play the false humility game. I know I've had some experience, and I know I have gifts. Just questioning myself in terms of what I'm capable of... In the midst of the excitement and desire to get started, there is still fear. Want to be real and call it for what it is. Could definitely use different words to lighten the effect, but I know it wouldn't be completely truthful.

Much that is that shouldn't be and much that should be that isn't.