Jerk?

Good day.  I mean that both as a greeting and a description of most of my day.  A very sweet friend volunteered to watch our kids… the same precious friend who has already done this for us once this week.  She’s an absolute weirdo.  I mean that in the positive way.  The way she serves and loves can only be described as weird and awkward.  It doesn’t make sense.  I’d like to be more like this weirdo.  Grateful for her.  Anyways, this facilitated a really sweet time with Kel.

Much of the rest of the day was spent becoming more aware of how I need to be rescued from myself.  I’m often a jerk.  Don’t argue that with me because then I’ll have to prove it.  It wouldn’t be hard.  I’m not wallowing in self-hatred.  It’s just been a day where I’ve seen a good bit of my grossness… shining brightly… shining like Moses’ radiant face did.  Unfortunately, it’s not shining in a positive way.

At the end of our date we went by Target and Wal-mart… I think this is what every married couple does at the end of a date... don't they?  Anyways, before we got home, we stopped by a little produce stand on George Light.  We call the farmer, “Farmer George.”  I have no idea if that’s actually his name.  Odds aren’t in favor of it being his name.  It’s just that he sets up his stand on George Light Road… therefore, Farmer George seemed to roll off the tongue rather easily.

Well, the Black Pearl (if you don’t know, that’s my car… a black Toyota Forerunner… she’s awesome)… she didn’t start.  She tried.  I’m really not upset with her.  I could tell she was giving it all she had.  Kelly took off in a fast run to the house so we could relieve Weirdo (as mentioned earlier in this entry).  I decided to ask Farmer George and his associates if anyone had jumper cables.  Sure enough, one of his associates did.  We’ll just call his associate, Old Guy.  It was a great struggle for Old Guy (who really was quite old) to stand… even more so to walk.  He carried himself in a rather awkward way… as if every movement was painful.  Not positive, but it appeared he was a stroke victim.  He couldn’t get his words and sounds out very well.  It was a great strain for me to catch what he said.  From the pattern of facial hair on his face it was obvious that he couldn’t even perform simple tasks like shaving.  Yet, he gladly offered to help me.  As he moved his car closer to the Black Pearl, I noticed from his license plate that he was a disabled veteran.  He jumpstarted my car in a minute or two.  The groceries in my car would not be ruined after all.  He rescued me.

I was grateful for his help.  I was embarrassed that I have not been more grateful for the way men like Old Guy have served our country for me (and you!)… given  much of themselves… I mean that literally and metaphorically.  I have thought about it some, but seeing a face and a broken body brings greater weight to his sacrifice for what you and I enjoy… unfortunately, I just seem to take for granted.

Later our power went out… it was out for a couple hours.  Man, I take that for granted.  I think I take most things for granted.  No electricity simply added to my grumpiness (notice how I blame my grumpies on the lack of electricity… again, I’m the victim… as always).  I was already grumpy, and I had manifested my selfishness in even more overt ways to Kelly.  Not a pretty picture of AV today in relational theology (= theology in the context of relationships).

The ironic thing is that I had been talking to my kids about the widow’s mite this evening.  I tried to explain how everything is His.  It’s all a gift from Him.  He provides and sustains.  He’s entrusted us with it.  All that we do and have should be treated as that which has been entrusted to us by the Father.

I did teach that, but I chose to live the “Entitled Life” today.  Maybe tomorrow I’ll choose to live a little more Christ-like... maybe.