It Starts Early

My son, Elliott, is 3.  He’s the perfect size to tickle, to tackle, to carry… to eat his belly… all the usual things.  Everything he says and does is cute.  Even better than all of that… I am his hero.  At least I was.  I was gone for 17 days in June.  Bud (that’s Elliott’s love name) didn’t like that very much.  He’s been punishing me since I’ve been back.  Little things.  For example, when it’s time to tuck him in for naps or bed, he quickly says, “Not you!  I want Mama to do it!”  It hurts.  I’m the official tucker.  I love tucking him in.  He knows that it hurts me.  I’ve tried little mind games in my defense.  I’ve said, “Well, I’m going to go tuck Charli in,” as I try to seem uninterested that he’s going to bed.  I’m really trying to bait him into saying, “Daddy, you can tuck me in too.”  I wait and listen for it, but I don’t hear it.  He’s frustrated with me, and I’m feeling that punishment.

I immediately ask myself, “Do I do this?  Do I punish people?”  Not sure why I even asked the question.  Before I could complete the question I knew for sure that I definitely punish people.  Sad but true.  I don’t want to do that.

It illustrates what I’ve been talking about a lot in the blog… relational sin.  I still commit behavioral sins, but I’m a relational sin junkie.  Little thoughts, comments, self-righteousness… it’s gross.  Seems we learn this at an early age.  Hope my awareness of it continues to grow.

On the positive side, my family went to the 4th of July Parade on Monday.  We go there every year.  It begins with an insanely loud helicopter that flies up and down Kingston Pike.  Then, the festivities begin.  The kids are really only there for one reason… free stuff.  It’s not even good stuff, but it’s free.  Something about collecting free stuff when other people are collecting it… well, something about that feels like a competition. 

When the first lady with candy came by, I watched as she walked right up to Eloise.  Eloise opened up her empty grocery bag, and the lady dropped a piece of candy into her bag.  Pure delight.  Seriously, free candy is always a great thing.  Then she and I realized that Elliott did not get candy.  This was urgent!  Eloise (also known as “Shorty”) ran after this Easter Bunny – like woman with her little basket of goodies.  Unfortunately, she couldn’t catch her.  Although Shorty didn’t even know I was watching, I saw her reach into her goody bag.  She took her one piece of candy out and gave it to our 3 year old son.  Let me say that 3 year olds are wonderful, but they’re normally not especially grateful.  She didn’t do it for the “thank you.”  She was motivated by selfless love.  Much of her life is motivated by that.  It’s weird, and it’s amazing.  I see great relational power in her.  It stirs desire in me to love better.

I’m grateful for the awareness of relational sin in my life, but I’m even more grateful for the reminder of the relational power I see in a simple act of love by Eloise.  I have never felt powerful in my life.  I’ve never been especially power-hungry in terms of moving up that metaphorical ladder of power and position.  However, I’m more aware now of the great power we have within us (through Him).  I’ve never raised the dead.  I’ve never cast out a demon.  I’ve never healed the leper.  But… in the context of relationships I (and we) are very powerful.  We have the ability to love and to serve.  That is power.  We have the ability to use our words to speak truth and to speak life.  That is power.  Think I’ve had a strange (non-biblical) idea of power for too long.

Now that I think about it I’ve never known anyone that’s demon-possessed.  Nor have I known a leper.  I do know a bunch of people who need to be reminded of truth… who need to be shown love.  Maybe God’s given me the appropriate power for my specific circumstances.  (If he were giving out other powers, I’d still pick flying as my number 1 choice though.)