About Us

Not too much to say (at least not yet)... no long list of credentials... just a story that's worth sharing. I'm Adam Vaughan. My wife, Kelly, will also be sharing. We have 6 children. Our two sons, Lincoln and Tucker, have gone to be with the Lord. The remaining four with us are Emmiline, Eloise, Elliott and Charli. Charli is a triplet. Her brothers Lincoln and Tucker are identical twins. They're dancing with Jesus right now, and they're not sad about it at all!

Friday, May 27, 2011

Steaming

Well, I wouldn’t be honest with myself if I didn’t begin this entry by talking about how I am so steaming angry right now.  As I begin to share the source of this anger, I can feel my blood pressure start to rise.  Many of you knew Kelly and I before we had children.  It’s a little funny to think about because we always thought that we were “so tired.”  It’s embarrassing to think about how dramatic we were about it.  Life was good then, but it’s gotten much better.  Anyways, you might not know that Kelly and I had a miscarriage during our first pregnancy.  Our second pregnancy was plagued with fear.  Truly, we were severely crippled with fear.  To throw flames into that fire we had a nightmarish experience during that pregnancy where a doctor even told us that we had lost the baby.  God had other plans, and the baby lived.  That baby is our 9 year old, Emmiline.  Well, back to the main point, if you weren’t  around me when Emmiline was born, think of Moses when his face was radiating so much that it scared everyone.  In my memory my face was glowing in the same way…only for different reasons.  I was so proud, arrogant, obnoxious and over-protective when Emmiline was born… I can remember getting legitimately angry with my mother-in-law (definitely one of the sweetest people ever to walk the earth).  I was so angry because she held Emmiline too long without offering her back to me.  Yes, I’m being completely serious.  The anger was significant enough that I actually said something to her about it. 
You might not believe it, but I actually matured a little bit over the years.  A self-proclaimed, “I’ve matured” statement doesn’t seem to carry much weight.  It’s a little like, “I’m so much more humble now.”  Well, you can believe me if you want to (if not, watch out for my anger).
Somewhere the overprotective dad mentality decreased.  I have not been plagued by fear.  The birth of freedom… well, it has been the birth of life for me.  I mean that in terms of “life to the full.”
I’m steaming because that old overprotective dad came back out in me tonight.  Someone bullied my son.  I am not going to say when or where it happened.  We’ll just say that what happened inside of me was not pretty when I heard about it.  Obviously, I wasn’t present because they wouldn’t let me write this from prison.  Knowing that my emotions are much more raw than normal… they’re in much greater proportions right now… they’re basically about to burst out of my skin at times at the smallest of things.  However, as I process I realize that I can’t use that as the only excuse.
I love my kids so much.  I’ve noticed that when someone messes with my boy (Elliott)… we’ll just say that a raging fire inside of me erupts, and it’s a consuming fire.  Obviously, I get upset when my girls are treated unfairly too.  It’s just different with my boy.  Something within feels like I respond even more so with Elliott because I so miss my two sons, Lincoln and Tucker.  I never had the chance to play with or protect my twin boys.  It’s like Elliott represents all three of them.  I’ve only got one boy with me so you better treat him as royalty, or the wrath of Adam will tear your face off.  Trust me… I know this isn’t healthy.  It’s really just a reminder that I’m still constantly grieving my other two sons.  Even as I type this, my eyes well up with tears.  Grieving still…

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