The start to this day...
One of the darkest I can recall in a long time.
This princess and her smalls...
We live in boot camp mode.
Always preparing for battle.
Through the sweat and tears...
We ask Him to illuminate...
Hebrew's numbers from past darks...
An anchor to hold on to.
Today...
Something was different.
It wasn't just "one of those days."
The giant was larger than me...
The smooth stones had to be replenished...
Needing The Master's touch to mend the holes in my armor.
In the darkness...
I kept returning...
To old and familiar lenses...
Ones belonging to another.
Fit well...
Made sense in the flesh...But...
Shielding me from...
The light of The SON...
Shifting my gaze from promise...
Towards greater fear.
It was just that...
I'll.
Prayed...
Declared and touched.
Moans poured forth as I battled the toxic lyrics...
Stirring and swirling in my brain.
Interesting how one small misalignment...
Stealing all focus...
Throbbing with distraction...
Attempted robbery was taking place and I was providing the key...
I needed a new song.
This fear was not regarding the sale of our home...
It had nothing to do with the day to days...
It was a matter of the heart.
I was concerned for my Pastor...
His mission's team...
Their safety.
This lead to desperate need for MORE of my Papa...
As well as...
Repentance.
After hearing Pastor's voice...
A shift occurred.
I spent the afternoon soaking.
Needing to steep in the truths of who I am.
Full of desire to see more of how He sees me...
I partnered with Him in the declarations over my life.
I am not a failure.
I am learning.
I am growing stronger...
More healthy in the turmoil.
I am His garden.
He is The Gardner...
His organic fruits are the finest...
They come at great cost...
And they are some of the hardest to protect...
Bugs loving to steal and devour the growing beauty.
What does He see?
I am still discovering.
Certain IT'S NOT what I was picturing earlier.
Learning to turn my back on the lies.
Refusing to focused on the lightning strikes of the storms.
Instead...
Seeing the birds of hope...
He provides...
Always offering release over the rigid rooftop's of my story...
Each drill strengthens me for the next...
Preparing my wings to fly to new places...
Carrying new songs.
Celebrating...
This open heaven...
Filled with His supernatural possibilities...
Always making a way...
Carrying His red messages of love...
In all types of seasons... in all types of weather...
To those with great hunger.
Fruits have gotten sweeter in these parts...
No growth hormones here...
And no pesky pesticides...
Tilling... still The Gardner's Pick.
Coupled with the protection of His mighty hand.
Our God...
He is a wild one...
After the darkest hours...
Come the brightest lights.
As just moments ago...
He rained down the unexpected...
Much desired...
One month from today...
We will plant our gardens in different soil...
And new hopefuls will view the beauty He sewed into this land...
From this very window.
Release!
More to come!
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