Climbing on...

Our home has been on the market for about 3 weeks now. So far there's been no action... at least until yesterday. I received a call about a showing today between 4 and 5. As you can imagine we spent much of the day making the house perfect (which is tricky with 4 kids constantly moving around within it). I had a good feeling about this. “It only takes one person,” is a phrase a friend shares with me when we talk about selling a house. Something felt right about this. Maybe this was the one.

Anyways, we took the kids down to the parking lot by the neighborhood pool. It's a great place to ride bikes or play anything with a ball.

We waited and waited (seems to be a pattern for me right now... speaking of, still no word from Ohio). Anyways, they didn't show up. Obviously a bummer. That “this feels right” that I felt... well, maybe it was still right. I'll explain that in a second or two.

Kel reminded me of good truth. All is very well with us. This isn't a big deal. Don't give the enemy any more room to work. It did feel right as we got ready for what we thought was a potential buyer for the house. It felt right because hope was strong.

Resolutely set on hoping. Hoping for more. Going to keep climbing, clawing and clamoring for more... even when it doesn't make sense. Refusing to quit hoping. As we climb our perspective changes. The vantage point is different. Different is good in this situation.

Jericho

Our Spirits are wakin' up...

We do not wish to be conformed to the Jones'.  We want to be radically set apart.  Perhaps you have had an, "Oh no, what are they thinking?" when you have read a post... if so, I am joyful.   It reminds me of a song I sang in Junior Worship at Cedar Springs as a small girl, "I am under construction, the Lord ISN'T FINISHED WITH ME YET."  AMEN!

I don't want to make waves for wave-making sake.  I just want to be transformed.  I am certain the more alive I am the more opposition I will face, both with non-Christians and Christians.

Today will be a radical day in our home, and we are expectant.  We will be stepping out in faith in wild and wacky ways.  We are praying.  We are asking.  We are knocking.  We are seeking.

We invite you to do the same... for you and for your home.  May we call out together and ask for His Spirit to invade and consume.  Would we be willing to risk it all for more of Him.  Would we live in wild and wacky abandonment.  Would we be willing to walk in circles, in silence, seven times and give up a mighty shout, and watch the Lord show up and tear down high places.  Would we pray for him to break through?

This is where the Vaughans are today.  You are not only invited to eavesdrop, you are invited to participate.   What is your Jericho?  Are you willing to march around in faith and offer up your voice? Expecting... expecting... expecting... expecting... join us!

Arising with joy and hope...

a perfect day for crying out for AWAKENING!
The Vaughans yell in faith, WAKEY!  WAKEY!

A word

Sitting in a worship service last night I felt like God gave me a word. During the worship time while everyone else was standing, I decided to sit and commune. Sensed the Lord was saying to me, “Want Me more than you want the job in Dayton... I'm much better than the job in Dayton.”

Something in my head said, “Remember, 'Make the best you can with what you've got.'”

No, the seat's not big.  She's really small.

My perspective is changing. This is Charli. She's 19 ½ months, and she just got moved to a front-facing carseat in the last week or two. Legally, she was allowed to do so around the 1 year mark. Her body is still so tiny in the front-facing seat. Now she can see where we're going. She can look out the windows. Still, I notice that she mostly just looks around inside the car. Either way, she's seeing new things... from new angles. Her perspective is different.

My perspective is changing. The angle from which I see things is slowly becoming different. Still struggling as I wait. Finding more rest though... no matter what happens the promise, “I am with you,” remains true. Not only that, but no matter what happens I'm going to seek more of Him. Will seek knowing Him more intimately. More power in my life to serve Him. More of Him as I minister. More of His voice. More of Him manifesting Himself however He pleases.

Was reminded of something else tonight. As deeply as I want this job it does not define me. My soul is not in anguish. Sure, I'm struggling. I'm hopeful. I'm tired of waiting. But, I'm not in anguish. I don't want to talk or act like I am. Nothing in terms of being unemployed or wanting a job is significant enough to cause anguish of the soul. That's much too strong language. Although I have not used that language, I think I might have functionally acted or communicated as if my situation was of that gravity.

Grateful for a good word. Remembering truth. Still stumbling along. Just glad to be moving forward.

birth-day

Today, we are celebrating the day that Good Pastor was born.  He is not here and I am feeling sad.  This morning he started his first day working with my dad.  He will be doing landscaping until he finds a full time position.  I am very thankful for the work but sad to not have him around.

Good Pastor is dearly loved... especially in our home.  He is a fine man with an amazing heart.  He loves and shepherds us in a way that reflects the character of God.  I am a blessed woman.

I think this particular celebration is different for me.  They have all been good but my heart is viewing this birthday in a new way.  I think it's because of all the new things that have been and are continuing to be birthed in Pastor.  He is a new man.  I sense God's anointing on him like never before and I have great hopes and expectations for how he will be used.

Our natural birth is worthy of celebration...but, the spiritual births that God calls forth are so much richer.  No doubt, Pastor will enjoy his treats, good food, and birthday cake but I think even he would agree, the best gift he has received is a deeper hunger for the One who named him... I don't think I can make a cake large enough to celebrate that one.

I am reflecting this morning on God's goodness.  Adam's life apart from my relationship with the Lord is my best gift...his story blesses mine... his story is mine.  As I think about all the ways God has been transforming Adam I want to be faithful to celebrate.

I am married to man that is alive with longing.

 He is alive with risk.

He is alive with truth that is built on the wood and nails.

 He is alive with passion.

 He is alive with good fruit.

  He is alive with change.

  He is alive with play

 and he is alive with love.

Today, I am so glad I am not just celebrating the day he was born and his pulse... I am celebrating so much more... things I wasn't able to fully celebrate last year.  Wow!  So much beauty birthed out of so much pain... kinda like childbirth!

Happy Birthday, Good Pastor!
Love,
Your flock

New phrase

Been thinking and saying a new phrase a lot lately... My students still tease me about how I like to repeat certain statements over and over. Still aware I do it. Still completely okay with it.

Pic taken after eating roasted marshmallows

Anyways, before I share the phrase, wanted to share what I got to do yesterday and part of today. I had been planning on taking Emmiline and Eloise backpacking yesterday. With schedules and responsibilities it was just going to be the best timing to try to get away. Backpacking... not camping. Much different. Carrying everything you need or want on your back with you. Had been planning this for a long time. Actually, it took me at least 6 months to talk Emmiline into backpacking. She didn't lack interest and desire. It was the thought of using the potty in the woods that kept her from committing to go.

Well, we knew it was going to rain nearly all day and night, but we didn't want to miss our chance to go. Decided to try backpacking when weather was a little better. We settled for camping in spite of the weather challenges. May sound strange (since it rained almost non-stop for the first 12 hours), but we had such a great time.

This all to lead up to my new phrase... new motto. “Make the best with what you've got.” I know it sounds simple and remedial, but it's a good thing for me to constantly remind myself.

As I prepared for the camping trip, I tried not to buy anything for the trip. Knowing I needed rope (of course), I scrounged up any scraps of thick string / rope I could find. As I tied tarps up over the tent (and firepit!) I found myself using 5 different types of rope... several times it was little pieces tied together to make a longer piece.

I say that to share that as I attempt to “make the best with what I've got,” I want to always remind myself that I always have a lot! I always have more than enough!

I remember giving a talk many years ago. I shared a lesson God had taught me. Instead of comparing my giftings (or resources) to anyone else... instead of feeling jealous, frustrated or inferior... God's simply called me to be grateful and faithful with what I've got. And, again, I've always got a lot!

I mean that. In terms of having a lot, I'm truly loaded. The pictures below show a couple of the great gifts I've got.

again sometime?

Pastor's wife here.  It's a dark and rainy morning out.  I am sitting in our "screened in porch." Kim Walker and I are having some worship time together.  It's a perfect start to the day.

I woke up this morning communicating my heart to the Lord.  I want the favor of HIS presence.  I want to FULLY experience HIM.  He graciously brought something to mind.  Lately, my prince, Elliott has been asking one hundred million questions.  Remnants of my brain are all over my house as a result of his inquisitive nature.  It literally makes my head hurt.  One of his most common and favorite questions is at meal time.  If he is having something he enjoys after his initial bite, he will enthusiastically ask, "Can I have this again sometime?"

At first, it was endearing... later it was cute...now, well... not so much.  My initial thoughts were how much he appreciated the heart that I put into preparing his food.  Then, I just wanted him to be thankful in the moment.  I think this morning as I was praying God allowed me to learn from Elliot's longing for more.  He is enjoying the nourishment so much that he wants freedom to enjoy it with the certainty that there is more, and he has access to it.  It frees him up to enjoy in the moment.  He is tasting and seeing that it is good... and, he wants MORE!

My whole life I have been trained not to seek the "experience" of God.  While I do believe there is great truth in not just seeking an experience, it's also a VERY DANGEROUS mindset.   As I seek God, and He reveals... I become like Elliott... enjoying and so longing for more... I find myself asking... can we do this again sometime?

God wants us to experience Him.  He wants all of us.  He desires our head and our hearts.  He wants us to long for encounters with Him.  As we encounter Him it makes our bellies hungry for more... and as our hunger increases we find ourselves desperately seeking...  and His word makes it clear that those who desperately seek... WILL FIND.

Just like in Matthew 7, I am asking, seeking, knocking, and when the cycle is done I am gonna start right back over.  I will be like my 3 year old son that always wants more.  I want to experience Him everyday.  I want to see Him EVERYWHERE.  I want my heart to connect with His.  I am living to experience the One I am learning to know.  I am certain He is pleased when His children long to connect with Him.... because He is about relationships.

So, now when my little man asks, "Can I have this again?" I will remember my own hungry heart.  And, after taking a long breath...  I will smile and say what I believe my Good Daddy says to me, with joy, "you betcha!"

Rich nourishment entices greater hunger for more good things.  I desire to know Him, encounter Him, and reproduce Him.  May He continue to fill so I can pour out...believing today, that I can only keep that which I give away!  May we ALL seek to experience ALL of who HE is TODAY!

Grant us the favor of your face, Jesus!  It's what we pray... Kim and I...  and already asking... again sometime?

Learning

Asking myself what I'm learning today. Not sure. Not aware of much. Asking myself what God's saying to me today. Not sure about that either.

After sitting on those questions a little more... sensing God's telling me, “If you say that you want to be about 'these things,' then you should be about them whether you get a paycheck doing them or not.” That makes sense. Also sensing He's inviting me to persevere. My sweet wife shared some good words with me... as she always does.

God's given she and I a new, fresh, powerful hunger for more of Him. It's very strange. We want more of the Spirit. More of Him in any way He might choose to offer it. We're looking and expecting more of Him. We've heard talk of the Holy Spirit, and we've articulated much about Him. However, we're wanting to functionally practice life through the power of Him in us and through us. This could be radically different than how we've practiced in the past. Although revealed in the scripture, He is not contained by the scripture. He does strange things. Don't want my theology to serve as a self-protection mechanism against what could be Him working in unusual ways.

Yet, in seeking Him in new / different ways, I forgot something that Kel reminded me of tonight. For the first time ever I'm really looking for (and expecting!) the miraculous... healings, prophetic words, etc. At the same time, what I'm forgetting is I need to look for and believe in those things, but I must not lose sight of the call to persevere.

This morning I told Kel, “I'm growing weary.” It was true. That's how I felt. At the same time I said it because I was baiting her to speak truth back into my heart. Truth that I my mind already knew from the scriptures. She has done that. She's very faithful to do that.

Learning to... stay true to my calling. Reminded to persevere. Be willing to look like a freak show when necessary if I'm sensing my actions are of the Lord. Still embracing my awkwardness. Much to learn. Maybe I need to learn to be more awkward in some ways.